If you're enneagram type 4, maybe don't look at enneagrams

Trust me, us "individualists" already know how fucked we are

I was recently introduced to the concept of the Enneagram at work. The accompanying advice was to avoid self-diagnosis and to actually take the test, which, of course, is a perfect way to encourage people to self-diagnose. After reading through the descriptions I presumptuously declared myself a Type 4 (“The Individualist”). The test confirmed as much.

The problem is that most enneagram type 4 descriptions might as well be replaced with a single paragraph that says “Oh man, you’re fucked. Unless you can figure out how to pull some Thich-Nhat-Hanh level enlightenment out of your ass. You better get cracking though, because you’re not getting any younger.”

Check out these suckers, for instance. This is a description of Type 4 at “Level 7: The Alienated Depressive”, which is one of 9 levels ranging from 1 (most healthy) to 9 (most fucked):

Exerting themselves in any way is extraordinarily difficult. They cannot bring themselves to sit in front of an easel or a typewriter until their creative juices begin to flow again; nor can they call friends or go to a movie. Looking for work or finding a therapist is out of the question. They feel like staying in bed all day, and often do. Ironically, unhealthy Fours can no longer be self-indulgent even if they wanted to, because they simply cannot bring themselves to get involved with anything.

…

Unhealthy Fours are still self-aware, and they realize that they are depressed and on the verge of becoming even more depressed. They know that only with the greatest difficulty will they be able to keep themselves from going under emotionally. An inner light is going out, one which they fear may never be rekindled. Everything seems to be futile and dying.

-Personality Types: Using the Enneagram for Self-Discovery by Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson

Well fuck me! Whoever wrote this might as well just do us all a favour, line up all of the type 4s in the world in front of a firing line, and be done with it. As a supposed type 4 I’m not exactly sure what I’m meant to do with a description like this, besides conclude that it’s all hopeless so I might as well go out there and drink/eat/fuck my way to death before my stupid brain does it for me.

Likewise I wasn’t sure what to do when one of my therapists asked if I was familiar with the idea of Borderline Personality Disorder. I am, I responded. I’m not really sure what I’m supposed to do with that information, though, besides feel dismal. Here are some excerpts from one of the top Google results for it:

The risk of suicide in people with BPD is 40 times that of the general population. About 8% to 10% of people with BPD die by suicide.

Many people with untreated BPD also experience unstable or chaotic personal relationships and have trouble keeping a job. They have an increased risk of divorce, estrangement from family members and rocky friendships. Legal and financial problems are also common.

-The Cleveland Clinic

Gee, thanks a lot, Cleveland. This lines up quite well with some other claims about type 4’s in the Riso and Hudson book:

In the interest of maintaining a narrowly defined self-image, Fours may refuse to engage in many basic activities necessary to live their lives. ("I'm a poet. I can't work in an office.")

Let us pause for one second and unpack the ten bajillion unspoken assumptions that are required for this sentence to make any sense. Working in an office is necessary for living life. You can’t make a living writing poetry. Disliking the aesthetic, social, and economic customs of an archetypical office job must be a symptom of narrow self-image (as opposed to, I dunno, the possibility that human beings were meant to feel as comfortable indoors under fluorescent lighting as aquarium fish are meant to feel in a tank full of plastic plants.)

I do think it’s necessary to ask whether such enneagram descriptions are really written with the objective of helping unhealthy 4’s become healthy 4’s. It’s pretty hard to read any of the descriptions from level 4 down and not feel like shit about yourself, and I guarantee you that all 4’s have skirted level 9 (“The Self-Destructive Person”) at one point or another:

It is difficult for other personality types to understand that because of their self-hatred, neurotic Fours feel cut off from life itself. Everything in the world—everything positive, beautiful, good, and worth living for—has become a rebuke to them, and they cannot bear the thought of living that way for the rest of their lives. They must do something to escape from their crushingly negative self-consciousness. In essence, neurotic Fours must rid themselves of themselves, since they feel defeated by life and see no way of coming to life again.

Most of the descriptions sound more like the perspective of an exasperated therapist or parent. They see that all of us type 4’s could easily be so happy, if only we could drop our silly ideas and get on with the rest of society. Silly ideas like being unsure that working in an office is actually good for you. And sure, if I loosen up my tolerance for stupid corporate bullshit, it will probably expand my immediate option set for keeping the rent paid over the next 1-2 years. Which most people consider to be a good thing.

On the flip side, if we all stopped tolerating stupid corporate bullshit, then bullshit corporations would have trouble existing - and that would be great not just for 4’s, but for everybody. It’s this vision of the world that most type 4’s thirst for, and lack the patience to pretend not to thirst for.

This is a point that I think many enneagram descriptions entirely miss: they operate with the assumption that society has largely got it right. So any rejection of social norms must necessarily come from overcompensation for personal fears, as opposed to…possibly having merit.

I’ll be the first to admit that my bullshit type-4 behaviours definitely span both self-indulgent bullshit, and earnest beliefs about how things could be better. It’s often hard to tell the difference - even to myself. I’m keenly aware of the fact that this writing does not make me any money, and that’s not likely to change any time soon. I’m also keenly aware of the fact that every once in a while, someone pops up and tells me that this writing is real as fuck and makes them feel something - which is not a compliment I’ve ever gotten about anything I’ve ever done at a salaried job.

Here’s a description of the healthiest 4. Level 1: The Inspired Creator:

Of all the personality types, very healthy Fours are most in touch with impulses from their unconscious. They have learned to listen to their inner voices while remaining open to impressions from the environment. Most important, they are able to act without self-consciousness, and if they have the talent and training, are able to give their unconscious impulses an objective form in a work of art worthy of the name.
Having transcended self-consciousness, very healthy Fours are free to become creative in the root sense of being able to bring something new into the world.

This just sounds like…what all human beings should be doing. I’m not sure that the so-called idiosyncrasies of type 4s are as uncommon as we think. The 4’s might just be the only ones who are dumb / lazy / tired / fed up enough to say it out loud.

And believe me, us 4’s are all keenly aware of how this behaviour fucks us up at work, and in friendships, and in life at large. The confusing part - and the part that we hang onto - is that despite it all being so apparently pathological, people seem to really, really like what we have to say sometimes. So what gives?

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